Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Sweeping and Singing

I grew up in the country, where you could mow your yard naked and nobody would see you (or they wouldn't care if they did). I've lived in civilization for several years now, but sometimes I revert to my country-girl roots. For example...

Today I was vacuuming. I don't like to vacuum, so I was making up a song to distract myself. This is probably a sacrilege, but I was basing my song on Hebrews 12:1, which says: "Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us." My version went like this: "Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of dust bunnies, let us suck up everything that hinders and the rug that so easily entangles, and let us suck with perseverance the dirt tracked in by us."

A child interrupted me in the middle of my vacuuming and singing. This child was concerned that I would accidentally suck her up in the vacuum, so I made up a new song for her as I resumed my work. It was based on one of my favorite Mr. Rogers' songs ("You Can Never Go Down the Drain"). My version went something like this: "You can never get sucked, never get sucked, never get sucked up in the vacuum. Dirt can go in, and dead insects too, but not you..." I had to sing very loudly, of course, so the child could hear me over the noise of the vacuum.

As I inhaled for my next dramatic verse, I thought I heard a horrifying noise. I turned off the vacuum and listened, and sure enough, there it was again. The doorbell was ringing. Full of dread, I peeked around the corner, and there was a person at the door. She was probably thinking that this wacko broad (me) would be just the kind of person to buy something from a door-to-door salesperson (her), but she was wrong.

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Cooking Show

The kids and I watched a cooking show and were inspired to try one of the recipes ourselves. It definitely didn't turn out like it did on TV, but it was edible. The whole experience made me fantasize about having our own cooking show. Instead of a nice, big kitchen with all the newest, fancy tools and cookware, it would take place in our tiny kitchen with our limited supply of tools and old, well-used cookware. Things would be spilled and measured incorrectly (or not measured at all), the smoke alarm would be beeping, the kids would be bickering, and the phone would be ringing. The dishes would be stained and mismatched, and there would be no fresh flowers or lovely candles. It would be a reality show, the way real people cook. Would anyone watch it?

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Jail Break

As I was driving past the jail yesterday, the kids and I were having a discussion about what the jail is and who lives there. I suggested that we pray for the people in the jail and asked the kids what they thought their needs might be. My sweet, angelic son immediately answered, "They need Jesus." In the next moment, Sarah said, "I think they need a jackhammer!"

Thursday, July 2, 2009

Ebay Kids

I just heard Noah tell Sarah, "Mom's baby died, so she ordered you online. Probably from ebay." Looks like I have some clarifying to do...

Frightened Telemarketer

We were in the throes of a full-blown English tea party when the phone rang. I was going to ignore it, but the princess thought it might be the king calling, so I answered in character, as the queen. I heard telemarketing chatter in the background as an unknown voice asked if Janel was here. In my most dramatic English accent, I said, "No, I'm afraid not. She's gone to England!" He hung up.

Nothing Exciting

I enjoyed an extra long snuggle with the kids on this deliciously chilly morning. I thought it would be a perfect day to stay in bed all day. The kids didn't think so. We did the next best thing: put on our pajamas with feet and made waffles. We read a couple books, played a game, and are getting ready to fold laundry. The van is at the mechanic, so we're happily trapped at home.

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Day of Adventure

We had quite a day today! We found our way to our friends' house in Mossville, which is enough adventure for me for one day, but that was just the beginning. We held their baby chicks, and the kids all played together nicely. When it was time to leave, I started backing out of their driveway and noticed that something was very wrong. I got out to investigate and discovered that my front tire was completely flat.

As I started getting out the jack and the owner's manual and wondering where the spare tire was stored, an angel appeared (OK, it was just my friend's husband coming home for lunch, but he sure looked angelic to me!). Not only was I blocking his spot in the driveway, but he also had to spend his lunch break changing my tire. He had it done in no time at all. In fact, it took me and my friend longer to get the spare. I had to locate a screw in the floor, then locate and assemble a tool to unscrew it and lower the tire, which was in a case that was nearly impossible to separate from the tire.

So we got back on the road again and headed over to Forest Park Nature Preserve, which is right on the way home. Fortunately I had packed snacks, jackets, and hiking shoes, because we used them all. It was perfect weather for exploring the woods. We had a picnic, and I had everyone use the facilities before we hit the trails. Nonetheless, both kids left plenty of scat in the woods and meadows. Something about the great outdoors always makes them have to go.

Next, we went to the Tire & Lube Center at Walmart to get the tire fixed. They said it was unfixable and wanted to sell me a new tire. It's a fairly new tire with lots of good tread left on it, so I said I would see if a mechanic could fix it. Took it to my favorite mechanic, and he said he could fix it, so that will get done tomorrow.

So we were gone all day, and things didn't go as I planned, but the kids learned a lot, and we had fun.