Wednesday, May 9, 2018

God's faithfulness in the fast

Our pastor called us to a three-day fast.  Sunday, Monday, and Tuesday with no food.  I have fasted for a day before, but never three.  I told the pastor I would do it, because I knew if I didn't commit out loud to him, I wouldn't do it.  There have been times these past three days that my promise to the pastor is the only thing that kept me from eating.

Sunday.  I passed by the donuts at church.  Why do we have donuts at church if we're supposed to be fasting?  I think most people don't actually fast from food.  I admit I haven't in the past when we've been called to fast.  I'll fast from TV or Facebook or something else that isn't essential to life.  But really, nothing is as powerful as fasting from food, at least for me. It makes me realize how dependent on God I truly am and how little time I can make it without His provision of food and how much I take it for granted.  Communion came around and I wondered briefly if I should take it, but it seemed like a no-brainer.  That oyster cracker was going to have to sustain me for the next three days.  Sunday afternoon, I was hungry.  Sunday night, I really wanted to eat.  I was hangry.  I was tempted, but I remembered my commitment.  I went to bed early.

Monday morning.  Hungry.  I didn't want to do this anymore.  I decided to distract myself with birdwatching, one of my favorite hobbies.  I went outside to fill the feeder, and God gave me a huge blessing!  It has been my goal for the last seven years to have a duck nest on our property.  Every year, I make nesting boxes and put out food, but no ducks choose us.  As I walked to the feeder this morning, I actually caught a duck in the act of laying an egg in a nest very close to the nesting box I had made!  I can see the nest from my favorite birdwatching window.  After she waddled away, I looked in the nest and discovered three eggs!  I was so happy that I forgot all about how hungry and miserable I was.  God knew just when I would need it most.
By mid-afternoon, my loudly growling stomach reminded me to pray for my pastor, who is also going through this fast. I was trying to teach school, and Noah noticed that I was not all there.  He prayed for me.  A sweet blessing.  I love that kid.  Monday night was another struggle not to eat.  Hungry and headachy and weak.  I again went to bed early but didn't sleep well because I hadn't exercised at all because I lacked the strength.  I tried to pray, but my mind kept coming back to food. I made a list of what I'm going to eat on Wednesday.

Tuesday.  Really rough morning.  When I got out of bed, I almost passed out.  I was very dizzy and weak.  I sprawled on the bed and rested a few minutes, then got up more slowly.  My legs didn't feel like they could handle the weight of my body.  I thought about Jesus fasting for 40 days, which I never truly appreciated before.  I wondered how He could do it for so long when I'm feeling near death after only two full days.  And He was wandering in the wilderness being tempted by Satan!  I figured He must have had lots of help from His Dad.  Then I remembered that I have the same Dad, and He will help me too.  And then He did.  I shuffled into the kitchen and decided to make tea.  I don't like tea, but I wanted something warm instead of the usual ice water I've been drinking.  I went to the place where we keep the tea and found something way better.
It was a free sample I had gotten at Costco several months ago.  I didn't remember putting it in the tea spot and really hadn't given it a thought since I got it.  It contained lots of good vitamins and minerals and electrolyte replacements, and the expiration date was May 2018.  I mixed it with hot water and praised the Lord while I drank it.  It wasn't long before I felt physically revived and spiritually full of gratitude for the Lord's provision.  Again, He had been faithful to provide just what I needed at just the right time.  When Noah got up, I taught him a difficult algebra lesson about dividing trinomials by binomials, following the steps of long division.  I didn't have the energy to get frustrated, and we had a very peaceful time completing his math lesson.  A text from my pastor that he was praying for me gave me the boost I needed to go to work at The Et Cetera Shop all afternoon.  It was difficult, but I was so busy that I didn't have much time to dwell on my misery.  In the evening, I went to Sarah's art show at her school.  The flight of stairs almost did me in, and she still needed to be taken to gymnastics.  Mercifully, Mike took her.  I used my last bit of strength to make breakfast, in case I couldn't do it in the morning, and went to bed with it next to me.
Oats with mashed up banana, water, sea salt, agave nectar, vanilla, and cherries. I ate it at 3:30 a.m. Wednesday morning.


No comments: