"You look like a vulture trying to puke, but failing." Said while I was dancing.
Then she had this to offer Noah after I gave him a haircut: "You look like a Lego figure."
Later, another one for me: "You look like a person not to be tampered with."
A especially nasty one directed at me today: "Your legs must be really strong..." (If only she had stopped there! But no. She continued.)..."because they have to support all that weight."