Return of the Calgon moment

This all happened within about 30 minutes.  First, Sarah wanted to invite the neighbor kids over for smoothies.  So while I was making smoothies, Noah came running in the house yelling, "Mom! I need a tissue!  I look like I've been in the Revolutionary War!"  And he did.  He was covered with blood and leaving a trail of blood all over the floor. This used to alarm me, but I'm used to his change-of-season nosebleeds by now, so I sent him back outside with a wad of tissues.  I delivered the smoothies and started wiping blood off the kitchen floor.  That's when I noticed the ants.  There was a line of them from the wall to a chunk of food under Sarah's chair.  The food was so completely covered by ants that I couldn't even tell what it was.  I started killing ants left and right, smashing them with the handle of a little broom, and I was yelling at them, "Go tell your friends this is not a safe house to come into!"  Noah came in for more tissues and was still gushing blood.  He started yelling at the ants, "Thousands of your men will be killed in battle if they come into this house...but at least they'll die with a full stomach!" 

He went back outside, and I heard lots of talk about who spilled whose smoothie all over the garage.  I started vacuuming up ant carcasses. Sarah came in because she was bleeding.  A new tooth coming in was bothering her.  After getting her bleeding stopped, I had to make a trip to Walmart for last minute dinner supplies. I went out to the garage and discovered smoothie in my shoes.  I sent a kid to wash out my shoes while I put on different shoes and went to the store.  It took me less than five minutes to get what I needed, but when I came back out to the parking lot, I couldn't remember where I parked.  I wandered all over the parking lot, carrying my two bags and trying to fight off a wasp that was dogging me everywhere I went. 

Finally found the car, made dinner, everyone stopped bleeding, shoes are clean, Mike sprayed for ants, all is well.