Saturday, June 27, 2015

My husband's other woman

He's been looking at pictures of her online for months.  She's always on his mind.  He spends lots of money and time wining and dining her.  Yesterday I heard one of our children say, "Where's Dad?" and the other one answered, "Probably in the garage."  Because they know that he can usually be found out there...with her.

Often, he's showing her off to another man.  Last night I was looking for him, realized he was probably with her, opened the door to the garage, and caught him with her.  They had their backs to me, but facing me was a guy from church.  Of course I had no pants on, because it's summer and I'm in my own home.  Luckily I did happen to have a shirt on.  I instinctively slammed the door in Church Guy's face, then realized that wasn't very friendly, so poked only my head out to greet him.  But the men were only looking at her.  The half-naked woman in the house can't compete.

This morning, a repeat of the same incident.  Same shirt, same non-pants, same husband, same other woman, different guy.  It's not even 8:00 a.m. on a Saturday morning.  My husband is missing.  I find him in the garage, with her of course, brother?  What is he doing here so early?  He rather sheepishly says he was "in the neighborhood" (he lives more than 30 minutes away) so thought he'd stop by to see the other woman.  He has also brought his other woman.  They all four go off together in a cloud of stinky exhaust and enough noise to get us evicted from the neighborhood.

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