Say what you mean!

I was in between subjects with the kids this morning, and we all needed a break, so I told them I was going to take a quick shower.  As I walked by the phone, it started ringing, and I instinctively answered it.  Mistake.  I don't have time for long phone conversations during the day, which is why I usually try to avoid the phone.

This time it was a dear lady who has no children and is not known for her short-windedness.  However, she began the conversation with, "I won't keep you long; I just have a quick question", so I was hopeful.  She asked the question; it was quick; I gave her a quick answer; and she said, "I'll let you go" and proceeded to talk.  Since she seemed to be wrapping up, I started undressing and getting ready for my shower.  She said, "Well, I'll let you go now" and kept talking.  Ten minutes later, I'm standing in the shower, naked and cold, with my hand on the faucet ready to turn on the water the instant I can get off the phone.  By the end of the call, she had said, "I'll let you go now" seven times.  After the seventh one, I burst in with, "Ok, thanks. Bye" before she could launch off again.  She probably thinks I'm rude.  I probably am.  I've learned that when this particular person says, "I'll let you go now", it actually means, "I'm lonely and bored and trying to think of something else to say so I don't have to hang up, and I'm going to keep talking for at least another 20 minutes."

Another person does the same thing with email.  She often types a rather short email and ends with, "More later".  So I don't respond, because I'm waiting for the rest. I've finally realized that "More later" is just her standard closing.  It doesn't mean she is actually going to type more later.  So when I see "More later" from this particular person, I know it means "I'm done typing now. I don't have a thing else to say.  Don't sit around waiting for the end of this email, because this IS the end."

Then there's my son, who is so literal that he always says exactly what he means, and he expects other people to mean exactly what they say.  Idioms and expressions are difficult for him.  If you tell him that you're killing two birds with one stone, then he's going to look around for two dead birds with a big rock next to them.